DJ Cutlass Supreme Presents UK Bass
Wisdom tells us
that all things pass, that nothing lasts (fig.1). But what of those
things which never were? Take ‘DJ Cutlass Supreme Presents UK Bass’
(fig.2) released in the latter half of last year as an example.
Strictly speaking the cd exists as an object, but the genre it represents
never came to pass. Think of this review as the label appended to an exhibit
in a glass museum case – there it sits in a little pool of halogen
‘DJ Cutlass Supreme Presents UK Bass’ delivers music overbrimming with confidence and attitude, bad attitude. The artists come out of their corner fighting, apparently sure of their place in the limelight (for however long it lasts), but the particular light they worked towards never shone on them. DJ Slugo, Cutlass Supreme, Debasser, DJ Nasty, Non Stop DJs – where are you now? Have you rebadged, taken a raincheck, refocused? Or do you continue to work away, determinedly believing that you still have a chance? Maybe you do, only time will tell.
There is of course the little matter of the music and its subject matter. UK Bass appears to be a variation upon Miami Bass (surprise!), but with added breakbeats, a stripped down synthetic chassis and a sort of rough and ready/in-yer-face garrulousness. Some of the tracks are actually pretty good, particularly Debasser’s Dark Smile and Cutlass includes a couple of more classy acts in the form of DJ Rush and Ray Keith (PLEASE don’t tell me they were just included for their titles: ‘Get On Up’ and ‘The Chopper’). It’s sweaty, hairy bloke music. It’s naughty – have a read of some of these track titles:
‘Get Yo Jit On’
‘The Bass That Killed Big Daddy’ (our lovely old wrestler – is he dead?)
‘Big Booty Hoes’
‘Let Me Bang’
UK Bass is apparently well ‘ard, witness the lyrics to Debasser’s ‘Fat Girls’ (fig.4) and the outro statement (fig.5):
“Hello. My name is debasser. Enjoy.
Why are fat girls always so frisky?
Cos you can’t go touching them ‘cos they’re far too frisky
Oh so what the fuck
Let me see you bounce their butts.” (repeated ad infinitum)
Tough voice: Is that alright? Voohoo, Is that better? Aaargh Do you like THAT?
Meek voice: Oh uh yeah okay
(laughter and fade)
Whatever you think of such sentiments (and these are some of the less forthright expressions of carnal attraction), they acquire a certain frisson when viewed in light of the failure of the UK Bass project to take off. But then I guess we all fuck and die sooner or later, and UK Bass manages to sum that up in a very particular way, bless its slightly smelly, probably in need of a wash, white nylon sport socks.